Sunday, December 6, 2009

New Beginnings and Happy Holidays

Bill got this blog started, so I thought I should take a little time to drop in a post of my own! It's hard to know what to say or where to start. And who am I writing to? I suppose after I post this, I'll put a link up on facebook, but at this exact moment, Bill and I are the only people who know these writings are here!

Despite the paperwork craziness (see Bill's post below), I am thrilled beyond belief for this adoption process. Knowing that our child sits at the end of this road and that every paper we sign, call we make, and interview we have with staff and social workers brings us closer to our dream of parenthood. This is an absolutely thrilling journey and for the first time in a long time, things feel right. I commented to Bill yesterday that I'm excited for the holidays for the first time in about four years. Really, truly happy and not feeling the heavy-heartedness that's greeted me for so many Christmases.

Suffice it to say, we've been through a lot in our quest to be parents. So I do have moments of anxiety -- what if the agency decides we AREN'T fit to be parents? After all we've been through in the last many years, it's hard not to expect the other shoe to drop. But when I'm thinking clearly and logically, I feel confident that the agency will recognize that we are ready to be parents, and to provide all the love in our hearts, patience, good judgement, and support to our child.

We have a lot to learn and to share with our family and friends and hopefully this forum will be a good place for that. We are so grateful to have so much love and support as we start this process.

I was remembering recently that when 2009 started, I was so bitter. Marred with anger and disappointment about our quest for parenthood and the many losses we had sustained to that point. I bid a very happy goodbye to 2008 and welcomed the new year with hope for strength and, of course, a baby. We went on to go through more turmoil and the roller coaster ride continued. But now, finally, at the end of 2009, we're on a new journey -- the right one -- and I suddenly feel that my hopes for this year are coming true. The path seems so clear to me now. And, as I've said all along, everything we've been through will make perfect sense when we hold our little one, the child we were meant to have all along.


  1. I am thrilled beyond belief for you and Bill. Rex and I are so excited for you and can't wait to meet our niece or nephew! We know what a long journey this has been for the two of you, but in the end, you are going to have a beautiful baby and we can't wait to welcome him/her into the family. The two of you are going to be such incredible parents with so much love and strength to offer your child. We wish you much happiness during the rest of your journey and please know we are here to support you always.

  2. Oh Julie and Bill, thank you for sharing your journey. These posts left me with happy tears in my eyes this morning. And as for who you are writing many people love and care for you and everyone is invested in a new family being created. :)

  3. Welcome to the blogger world! :) I'm excited to have a new blog to follow, and I'm very excited for you guys and your new path. Good luck! Sending my prayers and good wishes for a smooth ride.